Instantly ZAP Holiday Spending Guilt & Shame | January 9, 2023

money Jan 09, 2023

Hello from my beautiful, humid, warmer than anywhere I’ve been the last three weeks, home in sunny North Carolina ☀️ 

I'm currently laughing at myself for thinking I'd write a short and sweet post today, lol. If you enjoy any part of this, be sure to hit reply down below & let me know!

How often have you caught yourself saying 'I cant afford _____" lately?

This period just after the holidays (often a time of excess + unnecessary spending, and even splurging to people please) can leave many of us feeling guilt and shame around $$$ habits from the last month (or year, or lifetime).

If you haven't been feeling that, congratulations!! You're likely doing work on your money stories already and are reaping the benefits of having a healthy relationship with it. 🙌

If you have been feeling any pressure/shame/guilt around finances I'd love to share a few quick tips with you to move through that in a healthy way.

1. Can you locate where in your physical body the sensation of that emotion lives?
– Does it have a specific look - a color, a face, an animal or shape?

2. Allow yourself to really get in touch with what's there. When was the first time you can remember feeling this way? Was it also about $ or something different?
– Just be curious + honest here, you're not trying to change or fix anything – your feelings aren't wrong, they're giving you feedback and with that you can CHOOSE to continue doing the same things that create that feeling or CHOOSE to do something different.

3. Now bring up a specific $ scenario if you haven't already, maybe it was your fill in the blank above or maybe it's something else. 

4. Can you find proof that the way this has been going for you up until this moment, isn't the only possible truth available right now? Do you know a friend, mentor or celebrity who's living proof that other options are available? Find proof of the contrary – this is your new daily homework.
– Whenever you notice beliefs popping up around what's not possible for you when it comes to money I want you to find PROOF of the opposite. Every time.

You might be asking why this is now your ongoing homework for life, well...

The brain is a very predictable lil thing.

It will always choose to look for more proof of what we already believe, what we're already telling ourselves, what takes the least amount of effort to get on board with.

So if you've been telling yourself the same money stories your whole life, and your parents and grandparents also have those same stories playing on repeat – your default will be a flavor of those stories until you choose to put the extra effort in to creating a new default.

Obvious shifts can start taking place in a day or over many years but it doesn't have to be super difficult.

I will say if you've never done this kind of thing before it might take a few tries before you really start seeing the thoughts, beliefs, doubts pop up and be able to act on it in real time – this is normal!

Don't beat yourself up if you realize a day or a week after a situation that you could have rewritten it back then and there.

Instead celebrate that you recognized it after the fact, that is progress! 

What I hope you get from this is that you're never stuck or trapped in any kind of situation – including those involving $$.

I've had clients go from barely scraping by on $1,000/month from random part time jobs to cover rent and food to creating $13,000 in their first business launch.

Others who've left draining jobs, others who've had $20k+ random, unexpected checks show up in their life.

Personally, I remember thinking I was being so unfairly overcharged for paying $300/month rent in college (forever sending so much loving compassion to that broke b* mentality I had)... to now 5 years later gladly paying $3,500/month earning more than what I dreamed I'd earn 'someday'.

The biggest common factor between us all?

We've all been willing to see things differently now than how we did in the past.

Ready to join us & create your own version of healthy, wealthy and vibrant?
first pause and take a deep breath... then keep reading on the next blog here!

If you enjoyed this & would like to see more long form writing either via email or a blog, respond below and let me know! I appreciate you so much 🙏 

Lots of love,
Mariah White


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